Pattaya Thailand 9th December 2015
I’ve come here from Nepal. In my view the most deeply authentically spiritual place I have ever been to what is touted as the “Land of the Buddha”. But unfortunately the reality is a little different.
Here duality rears its ugly head. In our society we are taught (well the one I grew up with anyway) that there is right or wrong, good or bad, moral or immoral and so forth. And yet what I’ve been realizing is that these are just aspects of the same energy. That there is no separation between them. That ultimately it’s just a choice and that our choice affects only our karma or consequence of our choices.
What some might label the most immoral aspects of western society are prevalent here. “Westerners” come here for sex, for “a good time”, for drugs they cannot easily access elsewhere. And it is there for all to see, not behind closed doors or down hidden alleyways.
The first time I walked down the tourist strip it turned my stomach. I saw nothing but fat old men trolling for or with mostly young Thai girls. My first time walking down Walking Street was equally nauseating and I was thankful that it was mid afternoon and it was deserted with its bright lights, sex show signs and so forth not yet lit up.
BUT the other side of this scenario is what the locals see as an opportunity for financial freedom. An opportunity to provide a service to a willing market in exchange for cash (and financial freedom). They view these “foreigners” like ATM machines, a ready source of cash that in their reality may take a lifetime to earn.
It’s not the first time I’ve come across this. Having spent some time in the third world so to speak and seen the good, the bad and the ugly. It’s almost like a form of reverse exploitation. That many will view “foreigners” as an inexhaustible source of cash and to do anything they can to exploit what they can from them. Two sides of the same coin my heart says.
Back in Nepal I’m educated about “dodgy” people, mostly Indians who ask the guides to fix them up with “other nice company” (quite often when their wives are out of earshot). Of course there is no sex industry permitted in Nepal so they are directed to equally dodgy dance bars that pretty much fleece them of their cash with the cost of drinks, ever hopeful they might “meet someone” there.
Equally disturbing is the number of men looking for a “hook up” on a permanent or semi permanent basis while they have wives at home or in a village somewhere. Lamenting that their wives are “just not into it” sexually. To be honest I’m still coming to grips with this cultural programming where people are married off quite young and women are programmed to hate sex while the men are programmed to do nothing other than provide financially for them. I’m thinking WTF? Is that not something that should be a beautiful sacred bond between 2 people. No wonder they keep looking for a connection with another.
The dualistic part of me just thinks “wtf is wrong with this picture?” while I am ever so gently reminded by a dear friend that everyone is free to make their own decisions. Of course my dualistic self is screaming “yes and face your karma you dodgy bastard!”
Thankfully after a bit of viewpoint discreating my evening walk down Walking Street seemed to be a little less disconcerting and at one point I was almost giggling at the resemblance between some of the prostitutes and blow up sex dolls (not that I’ve had a lot of experience with those either).
Is it about love in this energy? Of course it can’t be. My head says “Animal Consciousness), fulfilling a body function or desire nothing more.
Does love really exist?
Supposedly some are bonded for life, divorce not realistically possible. Wow what a beautiful thought. Except that there may be no real connection between them and they are constantly looking for it elsewhere.
Previously I thought certain things about the west to be unpalatable. The overt sexuality in the media, the willingness of many to just randomly have sex with whoever they can. But now I’m starting to think maybe it’s all the same regardless of culture.
Is my idea of love & commitment stupid.
It seems I was cursed with my role models. My parents have been together all their adult lives, I remember only a couple of very minor arguments my whole childhood, they are never apart and although they are not publicly affectionate (it’s a cultural thing) their love for each other is clearly apparent. So I guess my bar was set so high that reality can clearly burst that bubble. And my reference point is proven utterly unrealistic most of the time.
And in a dualistic world that’s the right and wrong, good and bad part right there BAM.
Maybe what people might be really seeking is meaningful connection. To love and to be loved in a connected space with another. Not sex necessarily. Just connection (the sex just makes the connection stronger)
And maybe what they are missing, the memo is that we are programmed to disconnect. And maybe they need to reprogram all that stuff so they can be more connected with themselves and then others.
And maybe I might need to discreate my reference point too………….